Humans of GKT

<p class="font_8">Toxic productivity is the outsized desire for productivity at all times and at the expense of our other priorities, ranging from family life to hobbies.<br>
<br>
I’ve noticed that in past times of stress or the buildup towards exams, I have driven myself slightly insane. People who are close to me agree. It’s as if all emotional and caring parts of my brain were shut off and I developed tunnel vision; all I could see was my end goal - exam day. I had an overwhelming sense of guilt if I did fun or nice things. I’d be out with friends when we’d all agreed in advance to take an afternoon off studying to refresh ourselves and our brains from the hard work, but amidst our light-hearted conversations, all I could really hear was a voice inside my head pestering me that my time could be put to better use. You should be focusing Kam. I felt that if my time wasn’t continuously spent being productive, it was being recklessly lost or wasted. “You’ve got this, you always do!” “You’re going to be fine” “We have so much time” “You’re working too hard” - nothing anybody told me could make me feel comforted. The only time I felt relaxed and in control was when sat in front of my laptop, working “hard” to reach my goals. As long as I was studying, I was doing “enough” for myself. I was “enough”, and I belonged on this course.<br>
<br>
Hours were spent in new hunts house library and the exam period passed, but the flood of relief and chill I had been desperately anticipating did not come. It was at this point that I started to notice some of my own habits and attitudes, which were preventing me from fully relaxing and recovering from my high-intensity period of revision.<br>
<br>
For example, I often turned fun activities into something productive. Starting to read new books for my own enjoyment turned into a goal-setting challenge with myself, where I would try to read so many books in a certain space of time. Going for walks to relax turned into a daily step count goal.</p>
<p class="font_8"><br></p>
<p class="font_8">I found it difficult to stay at home and do “nothing”, as sitting still felt impossible and unproductive.<br>
<br>
It may almost sound silly to some, but my productivity burrowed itself so deep into my mind that I became vacant, struggling to process both my own emotions and of those close to me. I’m glad that I am now aware of this pattern I have, and I was surprised that a few friends could relate to how I felt. I think everyone can take away from this the importance of talking, writing, and communicating what you’re facing. However strange it may be, or alone you may feel, chances are there’s somebody else feeling the exact same who knows what might help you or can at least keep you company while you figure it out together.<br>
<br>
I know now that resting doesn’t mean you’re doing nothing or wasting time. Rest is an essential activity for anybody, and we cannot function without sufficient amounts of it. It’s a form of kindness we owe ourselves. As for the toxic productivity, I’m working on it - any tips would be appreciated.</p>

Kamiela Soeldner

Year 3

10 Apr 2022

"I know now that resting doesn’t mean you’re doing nothing or wasting time. Rest is an essential activity for anybody, and we cannot function without sufficient amounts of it. It’s a form of kindness we owe ourselves."

<p class="font_8">When I moved to the UK for university when I was 19, I spent most of my first year wondering why I had moved here. For all of my life, I had gone to American-English speaking schools in China, where everyone looked and sounded like me, and it was common to have a very international background. When I moved to the UK, I was faced with many difficult questions that I had never been asked before, “Where are you from?“, “Why is your English so good?“, “What is China like?“. Although most of these questions were innocuous, they somehow made me feel othered and more often than not, were conversation enders rather than conversation starters. People couldn’t seem to understand that who I was had very little to do with my national identity, and where I grew up was rarely my home. Even though London touts itself as being one of the most international cities in the world, it didn’t stop me from feeling isolated, isolation that eventually turned into depression.<br>
<br>
After the first, and worst year of my life in the UK, I eventually began to make close friends and embrace my life in the UK. It wasn’t easy, but eventually I stopped needing to try to fit in, and fitting in just became second nature. After 6 years in the UK, when people ask me where I’m from, I say London (regardless of the fact that I’m not a British citizen). I thought I would end this blurb just by saying, you don’t need a reason to be anywhere geographically in the world. Home is what you make of a place, not somewhere you were born.</p>

Valerie Cai

Year 3

5 Apr 2022

"You don’t need a reason to be anywhere geographically in the world. Home is what you make of a place, not somewhere you were born.”

<p class="font_8">I first heard of Shout, a crisis text messaging service accessed by texting SHOUT to 85258, last summer. The service connects someone (who is normally experiencing a mental health crisis) by text message to a volunteer. The premise of a Shout conversation is to help a texter move from a “hot moment” to a “cool calm” in order to de-escalate a situation. As a volunteer, you are, for the majority of texters, the first person they have opened. Conversely, you may be the last hope for someone who is in a crisis who has tried every other service.<br>
<br>
The five steps of each conversation are building rapport, exploring a texter’s issue, identifying the goal of the conversation, discovering next steps and ending the conversation. During the exploration stage (similar to history of presenting complaint) it’s important to establish how long they’ve been feeling like this and what, if anything, has triggered this. You must also perform a risk assessment as, in some instances, there may be imminent risk at which point emergency services may be required.</p>
<p class="font_8"><br></p>
<p class="font_8">Identifying the goal (similar to expectations of ICE) allows you to understand what a texter would like to happen next during the conversation to help them. Discovering next steps involves making a plan to help the texter after the conversation ends. This can be varied and includes simple coping strategies such as going on a walk or listening to music or providing resources such as different therapy services offered through the NHS.<br>
<br>
Shout has taught me how important it is to see the person beyond the patient. Everyone has a unique story that deserves to be told. Simply being there for someone over text is, for most people, more powerful than any medication will ever be. That’s what makes Shout so special - it’s based purely on the idea that being there to talk through something with someone in their time of need can provide instantaneous relief. Even though shifts can be emotionally draining, the Shout community is so supportive and everyone is there to help each other.<br>
<br>
Being comfortable talking to people who are in a crisis is a life valuable skill for anyone, not just healthcare professionals. My journey so far with Shout has been the greatest privilege of my life. Being able to talk to others who are entrusting you with information they haven’t told anyone else is such an honour and I urge anyone interested to become a crisis volunteer :)</p>

Tom Honey

Year 3

11 Mar 2022

"Shout has taught me how important it is to see the person beyond the patient. Everyone has a unique story that deserves to be told. Simply being there for someone over text is, for most people, more powerful than any medication will ever be."

<p class="font_8">“You’re never too old to start medicine”<br>
<br>
This wasn’t just a sentence I used to comfort myself with but as I progressed throughout medical school I realised how true it was.<br>
<br>
I entered medicine as a 24 year old graduate student expecting to be surrounded by a horde of fresh school leavers and I was shocked when I realised that wasn’t the case. I still vividly remember the first day when the lecturer asked all the grads in room to raise their arm - and literally half the room did so! There was also a wide range in ages from younger grads straight from their previous degree to older grads in their 30s who were settled down with children.<br>
<br>
I originally expected myself to become acquainted and form friendships with grads however, as of third year, quite a few of my closest friends are undergraduates! Its an an interesting dynamic primarily due to the age and experience difference but it’s also rewarding.<br>
<br>
Finally, as I have already experienced the university lifestyle and a personal habit of running into and encountering the strangest of people and situations  I was rarely fazed by anything I saw during wards which provided me with a more confident perspective at times.</p>

Reza Sarwary

Year 3

9 Mar 2022

“You’re never too old to start medicine.
This wasn’t just a sentence I used to comfort myself with but as I progressed throughout medical school I realised how true it was."

<p class="font_8">Third year marked the start of my confidence building, being able to at least hazard a suitable enough guess at questions doctors threw at me, being unafraid to ask questions of my own where squirrelly and terrified second year me could not. I used to blanch at the thought of asking someone about their home life, it felt invasive and personal.<br>
<br>
Third year also brought the start of medicine really feeling like the daunting, all-consuming degree it was famous for being. I rarely saw my friends, unless obligated to do so via classes, or if it was excusable to see them whilst silently working adjacent to each other- stopping only to discuss how terrible this set up was for our combined mental state.<br>
<br>
Countless journal entries describe how overwhelmed, overworked, overanxious I felt. And countless more detailed how much I actually enjoyed my course, scrawled guiltily immediately following a lengthy description of how much stress the medicine brought me, in a Stockholm syndrome-esque display.  It felt like a never ending plate-spinning endeavour, balancing friendships, a new relationship, studies, work, extracurriculars, family, housing - the second I was able to dedicate attention to one twirling bit of porcelain, the next one threatened to slip off the stick.<br>
<br>
Managing my emotions, surging forward through the burnout and brain fog became a point of pride. But how far will I be stretched before I snap?<br>
<br>
This is your reminder to take a break, so that you don’t break.</p>

Paula Lago Burity

Year 3

3 Mar 2022

"Managing my emotions, surging forward through the burnout and brain fog became a point of pride. But how far will I be stretched before I snap?

This is your reminder to take a break, so that you don’t break.”